Today has been tough and sad.   I feel like a failure at so many things.... enough said!  Also would have liked to wish Ella happy birthday but no answer on her phone.

Sumer to Autumn

Well it has been a very eventful few months.   We actually had all six daughters in England for Jessica's wedding to Jonny Pearce on 7th July.   The run up was less stressful than anticipated, though the last week or so with a houseful of family all on top of each other did get a bit much.... and Amy and Jon and their two little ones, Hayley and Austin, decamped to the Peter and Honor Mason for a couple of nights.  Great to have good friends like Peter and Honor!    The wedding day was wonderful - it rained, but only when we were inside, and Jess and Jonny were able to have the photographs taken outside both at the chapel and at the temple.  It was a truly lovely day, with lots of laughter, surrounded by dear friends.   Jonny and Jess are now living in Reading - the only daughter to be living close to us, and that is a joy.

In August Leilani turned 8 and was baptised by her daddy, Adam, in Auckland New Zealand.   We were unable to be there but participated via Skype getting up at 3am to be a part of it.   It was lovely to feel the spirit of another happy family day.

In September, Tim and I set off on our first ever holiday without family, and not going to visit family.   Tim turned 60 in October, and this was an early birthday trip to visit NASA in Houston, Texas.   He has always been interested in the space program, and for two days we toured NASA and had a fabulous, interesting and fun time.   Tim was able to ask as many questions as he wanted and was like a small boy - very excited.   He was able to sit in the Appollo mission controller's seat - that was a highlight.  

We stayed with our dear friends Kurt and Kathi Nielson in Houston, and went to the beach at Galveston, also to a little town called Spring, which was so nice - real old time stores!  We visited the boardwalk at Kemah, and also had dinner there the night before we came home.  We also went to visit the San Jocinta Monument and had a tour - leanred much about the history of Texas - again very interesting.  And I discovered there that everything is bigger in Texas includng the mosquitos....  Kurt and Kathi took a side trip with us to Louisiana which was a blast.   It was beautiful, we visited New Orleans, visited Rosedown plantation and went on a swamp tour which was the highlight of the trip for me.   Amazing wildlife and so beautiful!   We saw alligators, big and little, anhinga, blue-winged teal, kingfisher, coot, grebe, herons and more, wonderful lotus flowers and water primroses, tiny frogs called cricket frogs. The swamp tour guide was extrememly knowledgeable and very interesting to listen to.    We passed on his invitation to stop off for a gruffalo wee break ....  he stepped out and went to pee, as he came back to the boat and pushed off he said 'this is just the kind of area the female alligators chose to nest!'   I was so pleased I didn't need the loo!  

Later while having luchng in the nearby small town of Henderson, an alligator swam past the the restaurant - amazing!  We also ate lots of wonderful food - including alligator, crab, oysters, catfish, and when we returned to Texas - Texas barbecue and a wonderful steak on our last night.   The whole trip and most especially the Louisiana part felt like one long progressive dinner!   In Louisiana we stayed with John and Nayda, wonderfully hospitable friends of Kurt and Kathi and now ours too.    On the way home we  visited Tim's auntie Vi, sister of his mum, in New Iberia.   She was an absolute hoot - really funny.   Aunty Vi talked non-stop, and at one point she said ' enough about me tell me about yourselfves' and then withoug so much as drawing breath carried on talking.   When we were leaving and taking photos on the first shot she said 'Cheese', on the second shot she said 'Cheese - I could have said sex but I didn't!'.   We spent a wonderful couple of hours with her.  

We also went to both the Houston and Baton Rouge temples, and watched general conference.

We came home the week before Tim's birthday, and Amy, Jon, and family and Caitlin came down from Yorkshire to spend the weekend of his birthday with us.  We had a winter picnic with hotdogs at the Rainforest Centre near Newbury - I think!  It seemed a very twisty turny drive to the middle of nowhere.

It was wonderful for Tim and I to be alone together, to spend time doing things selfishly for just the two of us, and we had a great time - we will holiday alone together again.

And now we are home... life goes on - sometimes very happy as this summer has been, and sometimes sad, and difficult, all of it for our good and too many blessings to count, not the least of which are wonderful memories of this summer.

The reality of retiring...

Well this week is the first week that doesn't feel like I am just still on holiday - very odd....   I seem to be doing a lot of running around, and will need to be more disciplined I think to make good use of my time.   That said my ironing basket is empty for the first time in ages.   I did learn to cook paella at YW camp and made that for supper last night, and Tim is enjoying coming home to dinner almost ready - ha ha a very uncommon occurence when I was working.

I have been trying to do good deeds for others, following the example of Richard Auger's http://doingtengoodthings.blogspot.co.uk example, but haven't made it to 10 in a day yet.   Visiting Nanny Henry took four and half hours on Monday so quite hard to fit in anythng more than being a considerate driver.   Some of the things I do are so enjoyable it hardly seems fair to think of them as doing good deeds too.  I won't be keeping count but Richard has made me think about it.

Today I was able to visit Martin and Alison Boome because they were in Reading to help take care of Martin's elderly parents, and that was lovely.   I also met a former work colleague for lunch, Maureen Sable - and that was also great, nice to catch up.   This evening I went to visit Pam Skeete with Margaret Goddard, and I think that was good for both Pam and Margaret - it was certainly good for me : )  I do love visiting teaching - I always come home feeling good.

Last week I was up in Yorkshire and was able to spend time with the four grandchildren up there, and help Amy out by looking after Hayley and Austin so she could sleep after her two night shifts - that was fun, and it was lovely to spend time with Caitlin and her two little boys too.   I did enjoy have unpressured time to chat with all the family.    Heather and George were in York on Friday from South Africa, on their way home from a cruise to Alaska and we had a lovely fish and chip lunch with them at The Wetherby Whaler just on the north of York - a short but pleasant visit.

I haven't walked for just over a week now so need to get back to that - but I have seen the dentist and had a bone density scan - my family will be pleased to know they won't be nursing me back to health after broken bones anytime soon.   Off to the temple tomorrow with Cheryl Carvill and Kathy Wright and then to finish preparing my RS lesson for Sunday, and try and figure out why I can't text Sheri in NZ or Jess here in Reading!

The countdown... and other things..

So there are four more days to retirement... and 11 days to Jessica's wedding.   Sheri has left to start her journey home for the wedding, and will arrive on Wednesday (I'm writing this on Monday night, Tuesday am in Auckland).   Sam, Becky and Lani leave Auckland on Friday ( their Saturday) and arrive on Sunday.   Cait is coming down by train from Yorkshire on Sunday, and Amy and her two little ones, Hayley and Austin, arrive on Tuesday.   Richard, Jon and Cait's littlies, Sam and Ethan will come down on Friday.   I am sooo excited!    

I am trying (not too successfully!) to put out of my mind the concerns about the wedding dress still needing another fitting, no idea what to put on the pew ends, how we will lay out the hall in a way that seems sensible but still keeps Jess happy, no veil or headdress yet, the fact that Jess wants to go to the church in Jonny's polo, and all I can think about that is 'the dress will get crushed in a small car' - you get the picture I'm sure!  

This evening I just had to take some time out, and went looking for mango chutney for the wedding just to be alone for a while, should be so happy but suddenly felt sad and weepy - said goodbye to a couple of people I will not see again at the office before I leave as they will be away on business now till next week.   Also had email farewell messages from colleagues in London, and a card from Kev Frewin.  Made me just feel a bit of an anti-climax - would have been lovely to be able to have a big party to go out, but the timing is all wrong with the EMEA conference in Budapest this week.   That feeling of sadness spread to wedding .... feel sad that nothing I suggest to Jess seems to be right, and will not have any time with her now before the wedding.   Tim, unbeknown to me, arranged to take her out tomorrow evening for some Dad and Daughter time and that is lovely for them.

On Thursday night I have my Hot Stones therapy assessment - and I feel so unprepared - so that is what all this blogging is about PROCRASTINATION - putting off attacking the outstanding work!    I have written one paper, and need to write up my case studies.   Better get to it - I don't deal with failure well....

Last night we had our annual Relief Society stake fireside - it was a great evening as always, and I came home feeling so good.... amazing how quickly my mood can change from feeling content and happy last evening to sad and a bit down tonight.     But one thing that someone said last night has just come to mind - every day there is something to be grateful for, and my goodness I have so much to be grateful for.   A wonderfully kind husband, who is a great dad, my family are all well and healthy - and I know that we will have much laughter together over the coming days.   And best of all in just 11 days we will go to the temple to witness the sealing of Jonny and Jessica - we are grateful to have these lovely young people in our lives!

Just how far this mind has wandered....

So a couple of days ago I decided it was time to add something to this, only to discover that I had forgotten how to get back to the blog!!!    Heaven alone knows how long I would have hunted....thanks Becky for reminding me.
So my last hell of January is almost over.   For the last 14 and a half years I have been working in the expatriate tax dept of first Arthur Andersen and then Deloitte.   The UK tax filing deadline is 31st January, and that means that for the last several Christmases I have felt under awful pressure to pull a lovely Christmas together (because I love Christmas!) and also deliver long hours in the office.    And January means not seeing my husband much, and not sleeping well for worrying about the work, etc etc.

In June this year I will retire, and make a complete change in my direction.    I have trained as a massage therapist, and intend to work from home to supplement my pension.    It has taken me 18 months to get to the point where I can now charge, and have set up a room in the house with the equipment I need, and am eager to get going.   Becky has set up a website for me

Well I did say I had a wandering mind...  I lost my blog!   No idea where I had created it, and couldn't remember what I had callled it......   Family members will not be surprised.

We are preparing for Jessica's wedding and I am so excited!   Jonny is lovely and all my girls will be home : )  that smile is just not big enough.    We are going to be busy in the first week all are home, but I am hoping there will be time for fun too.... I know there will be a lot of laughing as we work together to pull this off for Jess.  Her colours are beautiful, and we will have fun decorating the hall.

Must head to work - just two and a half weeks till I retire - well stop working at Deloitte anyway - I have plans!

Just how lost is this wandering mind???

So decided I would add a new post, only to find I could not remember where or how.......

Well for the past 14.5 years I have worked in expatriate tax, first with Arthur Andersen, and then with Deloitte.   As the UK tax filing deadline is 31 January for the past several years, the run up to Christmas has been very stressful, trying to pull a lovely Christmas out of the bag (I love Christmas!) while working frantically in the build up to the hell that is January.   As I approach the end of my last January, I thought I would make a few notes about my memory of it all.   January is working long days, going to the office in the dark, coming home in the dark, waking in the night worrying about work that I still need to do, eating take aways in the office, and at least once each season making a home-cooked meal with vegetables to cheer up the team and raise morale.   The evening meals, take-away or home cooked have built up great memories of laughter and friendships which have helped to relieve the stress.   There have always been a core of people who I thought 'if he/she leaves I will resign' and I know that for some of the staff that has been their thought about me when it has been tough.   I have loved working with great professional colleagues who care deeply about the quality of their work, and the relationships they have with their clients.   I have been inspired by Paul Gravett who I saw come in as a graduate and is now a director, bucking to make partner, Claire Morrow - who should just be bottled and passed out when people need cheering up, and whose competitive spirit has enlivened many a busy season.  Dan Doe, the joker in the pack, with the softest heart, and a desire to work within the system and never seek special favours,  Steve Macleod - practical joker, teller of my kind of jokes, and good guy who really should be a writer.  Matt Thames, whose love for his wife and family has always been so clear, and his desire to do good work for the right reasons, are impressive.    I have worked with partners with a wealth of knowledge and great loyalty to their staff, and Mark Williams and Drew Buckle will hold a special place in my memory.  Too many good people to name them all, and I have had the privilege of meeting colleagues from all round the world, at training sessions and as they have come on secondment to our office.   Life has been very good for me in these years, a blessing for which I am and always have been very grateful.   I have said so very many time 'If I have to work, then how grateful I am to have this environment, these people to work with and this work to do'.

So in five months I will leave for a complete change of direction.   I have been training as a massage therapist and will be working from home a couple of days a week to supplement my pension. I am excited for the challenge and really hope I can make it work.    I have learned full body Swedish massage, Indian Head Massage and Hot Stone techniques.   I have been pracitising on colleagues and friends, and am now ready to start earning some money!!   The training and set up costs have been just over £2000, so I have some way to go to even break even, and in 150 days I will make a proper start.  

Becky has set up a website for me http://www.wix.com/kathrynwitts/massage#!treatments - be patient it takes a minute or two to load.

Enough for now - the next post will be about family and the two weddings we have this year : )  Happy times x